Five Things That Piss Me Off About FIFA 14

If you like football then the game with probably the most replay value – in that you can play it with friends and it’ll never get even slightly boring – is FIFA.

Having moved onto FIFA from the sinking ship of PES a few years ago, I’ve bought it every year and more than gotten my money’s worth from them.

And the same is true of FIFA 14. Though I’m still waiting for my mates to catch up and buy their PS4s and PS Plus subscriptions, I’m having a mostly good time playing online Seasons mode – or in other words, ranked matches – with random people online.

But that doesn’t mean the game is perfect; of course it’s not. In fact, it’s bloody frustrating at times.

So here’s a list of five things that are really grinding my gears with FIFA 14. Some are long term issues, others are specific to this new version.

1.  Gameplay Issues

While FIFA 14 has done a good job of improving certain issues – like for example the annoying one where throw-ins could almost always be intercepted – there are still plenty of niggles that remain.FIFA 14 Logo

For example, the randomness of Corner Kicks is still a thing. There are times where a corner will come into the box and no matter what you do as a defender, you can’t intercept it before your opponent heads it into the back of the net. And sure, sometimes you’ll benefit from it too – it’s completely 50/50. But it’s equally frustrating when you’re the attacking team and scoring from the corner seems to rely upon the AI moving your player into a position from which he can score. I’d love it if there was actual skill involved there.

There are other gameplay issues too.

What about the ridiculousness of the over-the-top through ball? I was playing against a guy yesterday whose only move was to hit a long ball from the back. Three times he managed to get a man through on goal to score, because the aut0-switching of defenders means that when control switches to your defender, he then stops his AI assisted run and is essentially taken out of play. Thankfully I won the game 5-3, but that’s not the point.

And then there’s the issue with poorer teams. I’d love to play as my team – Dundee United – but because they are only 2.5 stars, it means by the laws of football games these players are slow and untalented. You don’t get fast players anywhere but at the very top level it would seem.

2. Imbalanced Teams

I accept that when you play ranked games, people tend to want to play as the best teams.

But with FIFA 14 this is bugging me.

I’m not the sort of person who wants to play as Real Madrid or Barcelona all the time; I’d rather play as 3 to 4.5 star team.

What I’ve noticed though is that no matter who I pick, I end up playing against a higher star opposition.

So for example, if I play as 4 Star FC Shakhtar, I’ll never play against another 4 star team. Instead, I get put against teams like Liverpool (4.5 star) or Man City (5 star).

The most frustrating one was when I chose 3.5 Star Toulouse and ended up being put against Liverpool again. Because of the way FIFA works, I’m instantly in a position where it’s unlikely I’ll win if my opponent is in any way decent.

The only way to ensure you don’t get put against a noticeably better team therefore is, depressingly, to play as a team like Real Madrid.

If you can’t beat ’em, join ’em.

3. Inability To Mute Opponents

This isn’t a FIFA specific problem; it’s just that FIFA is the only game I’ve played much online on my PS4.

And I’m sure there must be a way to sort it, but I’ve yet to find the solution.

The problem? Players who decide to use their microphones while playing FIFA. And they always seem to be French or German.

Listen buddy, I don’t want to hear you have a conversation with your wife. I want to listen to sound of the actual game, not the sound of you.

I can’t even begin to understand the mindset of people who use the mic when playing against strangers anyway. Total weirdos.

The worst one was playing against some French dude who was playing FIFA while listening to loud French Hip-hop music. And it meant that I had to listen to that too, because the sound of the game was completely drowned out. He didn’t even utter a word either, which begs the question of why his mic was even on? I ended up having to just turn the sound down.

Come on Sony, give me a means of sorting this problem.

4. You Can’t Quit

Even if you quit a game of FIFA before you’ve kicked off, it gets counted as a defeat.

Now on the one hand, that’s fair enough. There’s nothing more irritating than rage quitters or – as was the case with the Xbox 360 version – players who’d quit if you scored before the five-minute mark of the game knowing it wouldn’t be counted as a defeat.

But there was a reason why players were able to quit in those first five minutes, and that was because of issues like lag or situations described above. If I start a game and find I’m a 3 star team up against a 5 star one, or if I hear the person I’m playing screaming down the microphone, or if the game is unplayable because my opponent has what appears to be a dial-up internet connection from the 1990s, I should be able to quit before a ball is kicked, no questions asked.

If I decide to quit after the game has started properly, then fair enough, but before it’s even started I shouldn’t be marked down for it.

5. People Who Watch Cut Scenes And Replays

I’m sure this will annoy almost everyone; the sort of dickhead who decides to watch every cut scene and replay.

Thankfully I haven’t been up against anyone who wants to watch the teams coming out yet, but watching extended replays of goals? That happens almost every time.

Now I have absolutely no problem with someone who wants to watch the replay of a good goal – a piledriver from 40 yards or an overhead volley is worth seeing again – but it’s the type of prick who wants to watch three different replays of a clumsy goal-line stramash or a basic one-on-one.

What’s wrong with these people?

Are they trying to noise me up or are they just weirdos?

There was one example of a guy who went 3-0 up on me and watched the replay of every single goal. And none of them were remotely exciting. When I scored my first and second goals to get back into it I just skipped the replays as I normally do, but believe me, when I scored my 3rd in the 89th minute and the winner in the 93rd, I made sure to milk every last drop out of those replays. It made my victory all the sweeter. The prick.

Are you a replay watcher or skipper? Be honest.

Get Involved In The Debate

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13 Responses to Five Things That Piss Me Off About FIFA 14

  1. danny says:

    Hi Stuart, mate that’s exactly the f*****g same problem I have with fifa I have emailed ea never reply back I’m just so so proper hacked off won’t be long before smash computer and TV up!!!!!!! I hate getting abuse from people because they didn’t win losers! But one my worse things is always conceding 90th min goals when I should easily won or drawn a game. Gameplay feels like changes to give opposition a chance its weird agree or not but I honestly believe its fixed too. Thanks for reading – bet can tell by reading this I’m very p****d off with fifa 14 now but still love it at same time 😉

  2. Obiba says:

    I Was playing online game(ps4) with My lil girl around!!! My opponent kept on swearing and using bad words…he wouldn’t stop even though I told him I had a kid around. I had to turn my tv to mute….not good. Sony should fix this problem

  3. So bloody true, I have just played a match with Sweden which are 4 stars and played Arsenal and got thumped, EA=worst gaming company ever…this is why i like PES as it is down to just player skill and the gameplay is just amazing i hate them not having the rights and the money to have better graphics and better servers that don’t lag, but FIFA has no sympathy from me, they release the same crap every year with a little extra graphics, the servers are the worst…EA get this right !!!!

  4. rich says:

    I’m with you on the replay wankers and I’ve had those people that watch the opening scenes. I would say though, it does make u more determined to win.

    One gripe I would like to mention is the absolute dicks who park the bus and get a cheeky headed goal, happens all the time in 14. It seems 14 hasn’t quite got the balance right for me. 13 seemed to of rewarded skill rather than dirty tactics.

    I will definitely try b4 I buy with the next installment!

  5. Jonny says:

    I HATE the replay watchers!!!! Last night this person watched every single replay that was physically possible then after I scored he quits UGHHH. Do people really have to rage quit every time they get beat though, every match I’m winning the other person quits. I always finish my game win lose or draw. Great topic by the way (:

  6. Samm sanders says:

    Another thing that annoys me is the fact both players can play as the same team, say or instance I use Real Madrid then I get matched with Real Madrid!! I don’t think that should happen!! I totally agree with everything you have sai too!! If you guys wanna play on xbox 360 add me up!! ooBUDDHABELYoo

  7. Im on your team with these lousy replay watchers, and even worse, I meet quite a few dickheads that wanna watch all the fing intro when the teams enter.

  8. kiksta says:

    then never play against the ai, because they make see every single replay of single bullshit foul the award themselves

  9. paul says:

    i play drop ins and what infuriates me are those who choose to be goalkeepers only to decide to play outfield or pass to opponents to score and also those who only seem to join a match to score own goals!!! they all need electrocuted

  10. Dave says:

    This game is annoying. But addictive. I really think the game is either for you or against you online at times. Ive won 5 games in a row in online seasons, then loose 5 in a row having dominated possession and shots. Its like your players go into meltdown or something. It is well annoying.

  11. Dave says:

    And I cant stand cheaters who pause the game just after they loose possession or im about to score or something. In the long run cheaters never prosper.

  12. ok where do i start le me see….been playing soccer games since fifa95 i think yeah….then at about 2001 some friend introduced me to pro evolution that was by far more realistic until 2011 i think that i went back to fifa because it “felt” real.I wont start telling u how good player i am and all..Everyone that loves real football and has played in his life will be a good player in simulations.Fifa is great especially in next gen grfx..but has huge gameplay issues…Let me say the most common annoying issue….Injury time goals(yeah the late half time or fulltime goals)…No matter how good u are at defending no matter how better u are in the game if u are in injury time the game engine will create serious chances for your opponent so that u can recieve a goal…2nd most annoying headers…Oh yeah baby…even my 90y.o. grandma can score with a header….Corners? sure…..crosses to a striker that has 3 defenders with over 86 defending and jumping…so what/? He will score dude because thats what the game has planned for him…And no matter how i love the game im so sick of recieving so many headers…Ive won so many titels in division 1 in both ultimate team and head to head…but its still frustrating to receive 80% of goals from headers…give us a fckng break….3d annoying issue ….i start playing with my team in online seasons im doign great winning every opopnenet for 3-4 games then suddenly my team starts to play like basketball players in a swimming pool….passes never make it….players cant EVEN control the ball…defenders will never intercept…..and with all theese
    even if u make to not recieve a goal guess what? CORNER—-GOAL!! yeah typical…..Me and my friends bought ps4 on realease to enjoy fifa14 imba gfx but we are all dissapointed with the gameplay issues….4th HUGE problem where the f…k is co-op from same console?why did u take it away ffs? u remove the best fun in the game that guys do since humanity started ? so if i wanna play coop with my friend wit need 2 tvs? 2 consoles? nice job ea…..
    I doubt that any1 has read my angry letter but i had to say it somewhere……after 4 years i seriously think im going back to pro evo if they fixed their issues…peace guys and remember to love the game play realistic not scripted…Jesus EA sports do u watch football do u see games end up 5-5 all the time with 8 headers scored ?..,,,

  13. […] although it has thankfully improved some of the issues I brought up last year in my “Five Things That Piss Me Off About FIFA 14” article – and that’s probably the biggest one of the […]

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