Movies: Midnight Special Review (or ‘A Big Pile of Wank’)

It’s unusual for me to let a day go by after watching a movie before I review it.

And yet it’s been four days since I went to Midnight Special and only now am I sitting down to express my opinion on it.midnight special

Why?

If it was really good or spectacularly bad I’d want to say my piece as soon as possible.

But Midnight Special is neither. It’s just incredibly drab.

Set in a dreary part of the United States, it’s an unoriginal and unexciting story played out by bored looking actors, such as an alarmingly old-looking Kirsten Dunst and the guy from Star Wars who looks like a cat.

There are no heroes or villains to speak of and very little seems to happen.

In a nutshell, a little boy who wears a pair of swimming goggles, has the face of a man in his 50s and possesses the power to intercept and understand classified government information is reported missing by a cult. As it turns out he’s on the run from them with his own father. Then for some reason the boy decides that he’s a super-being from a higher ethereal plane of existence and announces he must travel to a certain place to transfer over to it before the cult or the government catch him.

And he does.

And everybody goes home.

Wow…riveting stuff.

A reviewer looking to put the best case forward for Midnight Special would tell you that it’s unusual and understated; the sort of film that sophisticated people enjoy, because sophisticated people enjoy films that make you feel melancholy.

I have no vested interest in putting across a case like that.

For me, it’s a big pile of wank. It’s not so bad that I was moved to write about it immediately, but so boring that I just couldn’t be arsed.

And maybe that’s even more damning.

Avoid.

Advertisements

One Response to Movies: Midnight Special Review (or ‘A Big Pile of Wank’)

  1. […] which is a huge relief after recently wasting over two hours of my life on that big pile of wank, Midnight Special – and one I would heartily […]

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: